Reflection Episode: Tracing Tiffany Brearton's Memorial Stones

In this special reflection episode of Remember God, Brenda Savanhu dives deeper into her powerful conversation with Tiffany Brearton—author, speaker, and anti-human trafficking advocate. After surviving child abuse and the adult entertainment industry, Tiffany faced the ultimate test of faith when she became a widow in her 20s. Brenda Savanhu traces three specific Memorial Stones from Tiffany's journey, exploring how Jesus transforms our greatest "mess" into a powerful message of freedom and liberty.

Listen to the episode Brenda is reflecting on here. 

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Tiffany Brearton is an author, speaker, survivor, and certified biblical counselor dedicated to helping women move from pain and trauma into healing and freedom in Christ. She is the author of From Stiletto to Grace and From a Mess to His Message. Tiffany is also the co-founder of She Was Made for More Ministry, which supports women who have been in the adult entertainment industry and survivors of human trafficking.

Connect with Tiffany:

She Was Made for More

Official Website

Instagram

Facebook

LinkedIn

Timestamps

[00:00] Welcome to the reflection: Practicing the art of remembering God.

[01:15] Memorial Stone 1: The hair—uncovering identity and overcoming the fear of man.

[04:30] Memorial Stone 2: Defining freedom vs. liberty through Luke 4:18.

[07:15] Memorial Stone 3: The widowhood journey—from a headstone to a new beginning.

[10:45] The healing journey: Becoming "addicted" to the peace of Jesus.

[12:30] Courage in action: Following the example of Harriet Tubman in anti-sex trafficking.

[14:00] Final thoughts: Your story of hope is waiting to be heard.

Start documenting your own "Memorial Stones" today.

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:02

Welcome to Remember God, a podcast where we practice remembering God in the midst of trials. Hi, I'm Brenda, and I help followers of Jesus recall God's miracles to successfully navigate current challenges. Welcome to Remember God, a podcast to practice remembering God in the midst of trials. If you're a follower of Jesus who is in a difficult season and finds yourself wanting to take control of the situation instead of trusting God, this is the place for you. This is where we will help you remember the places where God has shown up in the past, giving you the tools and strength to navigate through today's challenges. I'm Brenda Savannu, author of Memorial Stones, Writer, Coach, and Your Companion on the Journey of Remembering What God has done. Friends, this is a new little segment. Since I introduced guests on my podcast, I decided to do a short reflection episode after the interview. In the short time I've been doing interviews, I've learned so much from my guests, and I decided I'd like to highlight their memorial stones. The episode with Tiffany last week was really fun to record. Yes, we talked about some really deep and difficult things, but Tiffany is an incredibly joyful woman who has overcome incredible odds. Today we'll trace three memorial stones from Tiffany's story. The first one I want to highlight is Tiffany's hair. When I was getting to know Tiffany and listening to podcasts and researching her website, what struck me first was her hair. Her hair is pink and purple. And the reason Tiffany dyed her hair that color was as an act of war against people pleasing. She told me initially she was terrified to do it, but she felt like God said, Go ahead and do it. And he asked her, Are you more afraid of other people than of what I think? So she decided to dye her hair pink and purple. She was concerned about walking into church that Sunday, but she said when she finally walked into church with pink and purple hair, she couldn't hide and she was still embraced. Tiffany reminded us that we can reject the way we are uniquely created, including our creativity and how we express ourselves. And when we reject that, we are essentially telling God, your creation is messed up. And we're coming into agreement with a false identity that the enemy is putting on us. So this was about Tiffany's identity. And it reminded me of Memorial Stone number 10 in my book, Benjamin, son or daughter of the right hand. For me, this is where I really started my journey of uncovering my identity in Christ, which I'm still doing today. Like, who am I truly? Who has God created me to be? And so I really enjoyed diving into this part of Tiffany's identity and how she came to uncover who she truly is. Because as you know from the story, she walked into a strip club at age 18 and started working in the adult entertainment industry. So coming from that to where she is now is just incredibly amazing, where now she's walking in her true identity and she is partnering with Jesus in setting the captives free. One of the things that Tiffany said that stood out to me in this whole section about her hair was that God wants the real you, not the version you think others want to see. Good food for thought. The second section that really stood out to me in my conversation with Tiffany was the distinction she made between freedom and liberty. She said, We are all free. Well, for those of us who have accepted Jesus as our Lord and Savior, we are all free because God saved us, because Jesus saved us. But a lot of us as believers don't necessarily act free. Liberty, she explained, is when we are walking fully in our identities because we have gone back to Jesus and allowed him to heal our wounds. She pointed out Luke 4.18, which in the NIV it reads, The Spirit of the Lord is on me because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. Because the journey of healing is hand in hand with Jesus. He's not going to force himself in. We have to be open to invite him into that place so that he can touch the dark places. I can testify to that myself, where I've had to say, okay, Lord, yes, I want you to come into this sensitive place in my heart, and I want you to heal it. If you read my blog, you know I've shared some of those experiences. So this particular thought that Tiffany left us with of freedom versus liberty reminded me of Memorial Stone one in my book, which is Dan Afflicted. Going through that memorial stone led me to invite God into that place of abandonment in my life. If you have my book, you know that that's the story where I talk about abandonment that happened in my life. And it was in picking up that memorial stone where I invited God into that space to heal me and he showed me what he was doing. Number three, uh, the third thing that stood out to me in my conversation with Tiffany was where she talked about putting her name and her picture on the headstone after her husband had passed. This was her second husband. That blew my mind. She had met this Prince Charming. She had found this man who really loved her in her 20s, and then he died of leukemia. Oh my gosh. I mean, she was so hopeless that she put her name and her picture on the headstone next to his because she thought her story was over. She thought she would never be a wife or a mother again. And she fell into the depths of depression. So she described that time as a crash course in dependency on God. And she spent a year on the couch taking care of her daughter. She said she barely made it to get her daughter up and dressed for school, take her to school, pick her up, feed her, and then she was back on the couch again. I mean, and I'm sure there are many of us who can relate to that level of depression. What struck me too about that was that she and her husband who had just passed, they had just been saved. They had just come to know Jesus. And then he dies and she finds herself on the couch in the depths of this depression. But the reason it struck me was that she agreed to walk with Jesus right before that happened, right? And he was there with her as she went through this depression. And then eventually, after a year, she met her new husband. And I asked her, I said, Well, talk to us, Tiffany, about how you went from the depths of depression, you're on the couch, um, you're barely getting your daughter to school and feeding her to a year later. She was in a relationship, she met a new guy, and that relationship led to marriage. But what she said blew my mind. She said she wasn't healed. She said she was a hot mess. But she opened her heart enough to meet this guy, uh, Justin, whom she had known before, is her brother's best friend, but she had opened her heart up enough to connect with him in this way. They had gone to this dinner, and the dinner went on and they connected, and then things went on from there. They got married, um, had more children. Um, and she said it wasn't until the age of 34 where everything came to a head, and she was struggling with anxiety that she realized she needed healing. But in the meantime, they were both going to church and she needed a miracle. And she heard a pastor talk about a miracle, and she said, Well, I need one of those. I didn't know God still did them. I need one of these miracles, so I gotta do what I gotta do. And they were having a um camp. She decided to go to that camp where she slept on the ground, which who enjoys doing that? I'm not, I'm not a camper, so I would not enjoy sleeping on the ground in a tent. So she goes there and that begins the journey of her healing. Uh so that really struck me that she was well enough to enter the marriage, but she wasn't completely healed. And then she walked through this journey of healing, but both her and her husband walked this journey. She walked her part individually. I'm sure he walked his part individually, but they they were both together going to church and walking a journey of healing. And I just thought that was amazing because it's not the typical story I've heard. So it was really cool for her to share that. And this part reminds me of Memorial Stone 13 in my book that Tiffany attached herself to Jesus and she kept going back. I don't know if you remember, she said that first encounter she had with Jesus of peace, she became addicted to it and kept going back for more. So that was her, that was her memorial stone. That's what carried her through this journey of healing. She kept going back for more. She was like, I I had this feeling of peace, so I need to go back for more. I had this feeling of peace, so I need to go back for more. So she kept going back. And as she kept going back to Jesus, layer after layer after layer after layer, she kept getting healed. That was amazing. That blew my mind. So the message that Tiffany left us with is that you are never too far gone. I am never too far gone. We are never too far gone. She was on a couch for a year, paralyzed by grief. She had um come out of 10 years of working in a strip club. She had come out of horrible relationships, and yet God was still there for her, and he didn't need her to clean up before he met her. He was just there for her and he kept healing her, which ties into Tiffany's second book, From a Mess to His Message, that we can come to God in, she would say hot messness. We can come to God in our hot messness, and he can work with that. Like that's not too much for him. And so that I really enjoyed that part of the conversation as well. So as I wrap up this reflection, I am thinking about Tiffany's hero. She mentioned that her hero is Harriet Tubman and that she watches the movie Harriet so that she can wake up with more courage. And the reason Harriet stands out to Tiffany is because Harriet Tubman couldn't forget the oppression she came out of. And so if you know the story of Harriet Tubman, because she couldn't forget that after she was freed, she found freedom as a slave, she escaped. She kept going back to free more slaves and bring them into freedom into the north. And she kept going back, freeing more people. The reason Tiffany relates to that, and that speaks to her, is because she's doing the same. She was in this place of oppression in the adult entertainment industry. She was abused as a child. And as she said in the interview, she recently found out that this adult entertainment industry she was in, she was actually trafficked, right? And so because she has come out of this oppression, she can't forget that. And she has decided to use her voice to free others, to bring freedom to other captives. And she keeps going back into these places and freeing, helping to free women who are in the adult entertainment industry or who have been trafficked. And so I think that is an amazing thing. And one of the things Tiffany talked about was about using your voice for those who don't have it, who don't have a voice. And so if you have the freedom of using your voice, use it for those who don't. Friends, I hope my interview with Tiffany spoke to you because, like she said, someone is waiting to hear your message of hope. I'm so glad that you joined me today. Next week, you'll hear my interview with Kathy Garland, and she has dropped some wisdom that I have been chewing on. I hope you enjoyed this episode. Please drop a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify or wherever you listen to the show. And if you haven't followed the show where you listen to it, please do so. If it's on YouTube, make sure you hit subscribe and the notification button so you know when a new episode drops. Friends, thanks so much for joining me again. And until next week, I hope you have a great week. Friends, here's a sneak peek into next week's episode with Kathy and Garland.

SPEAKER_00 14:39

The thing I would prompt people with is where in your story is God hidden just enough so that you can have the joy of finding him. So what I mean by that is when uh my kids were little, we would play hide and seek, and I would hide, you know, not so well that they couldn't find me, but just well enough that they had to look. And then they would have the joy, like, you know, in a hamper or something with my head just barely peeping over, and then they see me, and then they're so excited because they found me, and then they want to get in, right? So it's all it's this chaos, they want to get in, and it's my turn, I'm gonna hide here, and you go find me, you know. That's how it is for God. Sometimes he hides in your story, and he's just not obvious, obvious. It's not a church, the Bible is still there, but it's not he's not showing up necessarily in those places that you've relied upon up until now. And then some people take that to mean he's not interested anymore, but that's not what it is. He's drawing you to find him so that you will have the joy of finding him again. So we see that a lot in scripture, particularly the psalms. And I ask people, where in your story are you missing him? Look for him because he's showing up. I guarantee it. But we just need to be trained to find him. Is he showing up in the brokenheartedness? Yes. Is he showing up in the suffering? Absolutely. It says he sticks closer than a brother and he's closest to the brokenhearted, right? So is he showing up in nature and you need to get out in nature a little bit more because you're surrounded by the bings and the dings of technology that are making it hard to hear him? Where is he showing up that you need to go and find him and reconnect?

SPEAKER_01 16:34

Yeah, and the joy of searching for him in that place. Yeah. Oh, I love that. If this episode resonated with you, there are two things I'd like you to consider. Number one, rate and review the show. This will help other listeners find the show and get the same inspiration and encouragement you got from it. And number two, I would love for you to share this episode with someone you love and someone you think could benefit from hearing this particular episode. Also, if you would like to connect with me outside of this podcast, you can find everything related to me on my website, brendasavanu.com. There you can find my social media links if you'd like to follow. You can find a link to sign up for an email so that you can get weekly encouragement to your inbox, and you can find information about my book and coaching sessions. So, friends, thank you again so much for listening to this episode and thank you for considering sharing it with your friends. See you next time.