S3 | Ep.4 Reflection Episode: Tracing Cathy Garland's Memorial Stones

In this reflection episode, Brenda unpacks three “memorial stones” from her conversation with Bible teacher and author Cathy Garland—Cathy’s teenage deconstruction, her discovery that God welcomes honest questions, and God’s intimate presence through divorce, miscarriage, and long waiting—then offers simple journal prompts to help you recognize where God has shown up in your own story.

Listen to the episode Brenda is reflecting on here. 

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Cathy Colver Garland, oldest daughter of Dr. Randy Colver, writes Gracefull Musings, a blog providing women a moment of rest and challenge before those little fingers appear under the bathroom door. A former Vice-President of a software company, she currently consults with institutions and companies on marketing, sales, and strategy. She also mentors women in professional, spiritual, and personal development. Saved and living an “absolutely surrendered” life, her passion is to teach people to hear God's voice and obey, surrender their lives absolutely, and walk in freedom. She is married to Mickey and has two children in elementary school.

Connect with Cathy:

Website | Buy Revelationship | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube

Chapters

00:00 Introduction to Remembering God
01:03 Cathy Garland's Journey of Faith
05:51 The Importance of Questions in Faith
11:05 Navigating Wilderness Seasons
17:35 Finding God in Different Seasons

Start documenting your own "Memorial Stones" today.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

When you look back over your life and you see the seasons of loss, things like divorce, where you lose your husband and the potential for having children for some grief, right? And grief could be for losing someone who passes away or for losing a job or you know, for losing something, right? Disappointment, unfulfilled dreams. So when you look back on those seasons of loss, friend, can you see where God met you and how he met you? Just like God met Kathy in that cabin in the woods. And maybe it's through a specific verse, maybe it's a word, an event, a picture, a place, a song. Can you think of how God showed up for you during that time? Welcome to Remember God, a podcast where we practice remembering God in the midst of trials. Hi, I'm Brenda, and I help followers of Jesus recall God's miracles to successfully navigate current challenges. Welcome to Remember God, a podcast to practice remembering God in the midst of trials. If you're a follower of Jesus who's in a difficult season and finds yourself wanting to take control of the situation instead of trusting God, this is the place for you. This is where we will help you remember the places where God has shown up in the past, giving you the tools and the strength to navigate through today's challenges. I'm Brenda Savannu, author of Memorial Stones, Rider Coach, and your companion on the journey of remembering what God has done. Friends, today is another reflection episode on the interview I did with Kathy Garland, which came out last week. And so we will do what I did with Tiffany's reflection, which is just tracing the memorial stones that Kathy mentioned in the podcast, that the experiences in her life and the places where God showed up and how she navigated some of those difficult places. Kathy Garland is a Bible teacher and an author, and she's lived through some intense wilderness seasons, divorce, miscarriage, a near-death car accident. She broke her neck twice. But what struck me the most was her intentionality in her relationship with Jesus. She has just a beautiful way in how she relates to Jesus and how she even got to that place of personal relationship with him. And so today I want to highlight three memorial stones I picked up when Kathy was sharing. There are more than that. I'm sure if you've listened, you already know that. So let's start with the first memorial stone that struck me. So the first thing that struck me about Kathy, about what she shared, and even before I interviewed her when I was doing research, was that at 13 years old, Kathy deconstructed her faith. She was in her church with her parents. She saw what was happening with the church politics. She wasn't happy with what was coming out of the pulpit in terms of prosperity gospel. And she started asking herself, like, is this for me? And then she told herself, well, I actually don't think this is the way for me, this way of Christian faith, this way of Jesus. And so she just started drifting. But the great thing was that Kathy has a great relationship with her parents, with her dad. And she told him the truth that she didn't think this was for her. And instead of panicking, he took her to the library and helped her check out books on other religions. She said they checked out every book on every other religion that was in the library. And he partnered with her in studying those religions and reading those books. And as she studied, she asked questions about God, about her salvation, about suffering, about all of these things. And she asked those same questions of all of the different religions that she was also studying. At the end of that season, which she said was about a year, so from 13 years old to 14 years old, she said she came to the conclusion that Jesus is who he says he is. And he wants a personal relationship with me, is what she said. Not with the world, but with Kathy. And that became a memorial stone, at least that I trace, that she goes back to because as Kathy kept sharing within the interview, I saw that she kept going back to her personal relationship with Jesus, that in knowing that Jesus wanted to have a relationship with her and her knowing that, knowing that Jesus is real, knowing that he was pursuing her. That was a game changer for her. And that reminded me of Memorial Stone 10 in my book, Benjamin, Son or Daughter of the Right Hand. In her deconstruction, Kathy discovered who she was and whose she was and how much Jesus loves her. My journey was different than Kathy's, but we both arrived at the same place, knowing our identities in Christ. So, friend, if you have a moment, I'm gonna give you a journal prompt just on this reflection on what Kathy shared. When did you come to know that Jesus wants a personal relationship with you? And what was happening in your life at that time? So you can go ahead and pause if you'd like and journal that question, or you can come back to it and do it later. All right, so the second memorial stone that I traced in Kathy's interview in her story was that God welcomes our questions. So she grew up in a home where hard topics like suicide, suffering, hypocrisy in the church, those subjects were talked about at the dinner table where she talked about them with her parents. Nothing was off limit. And because her parents modeled a faith that wasn't afraid of being examined, Kathy started to do the same. And out of that, Kathy carries this conviction that anything that's really true will withstand your questions. And when I heard her say that, it was in another interview I'd listened to. When I heard her say that, that anything that is true will withstand your questions, it just hit me in such a way that we shouldn't be afraid to ask questions. We shouldn't be to afraid to ask questions of God, to ask questions of our faith, because Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life. And so because he is the truth, he can withstand our questions. And our faith as followers of Jesus can withstand those questions. Um, and as I shared in the first Memorial Stone that I um traced for Kathy, she took books out of the library and studied every single religion and came to the conclusion that the religion for her was Christianity. The religion for her was the religion of following Jesus. And so I thought that was powerful that her parents set such an incredible example. Um, and I like the other thing that Kathy said that this was deconstruction for her. It wasn't about tearing the house down, but it was just about stripping it down to the studs, right? And seeing what is at the base, what is at the foundation. And so her studies removed the man-made traditions and her questions removed the man-made traditions and kept the foundation of Christ. And it is from there that her faith really grew. Um, and I love that she said she sees discernment as both a gift and a skill that has to be learned over time, right? Discernment is also a skill. It's not just a gift. And so when we know we have the gift of discernment, we have to put it into practice and learn over time. Um, and it is an important skill to teach our children, because as Kathy said, right, she talks to her children about what was the message behind this commercial, because she's teaching them discernment. And it's so important for us to pass this down to the next generation, is discernment, because our children are not always with us, right? With us in person. And so the more we teach them to discern who God is, to discern his voice, to discern the Holy Spirit, um, the easier it will be for them to navigate a world full of mixed messages. So this wrestling questioning that Kathy talked about, um, it reminded me of Memorial Stone 5 in my book, Nepthali, to wrestle. Because Kathy saw her parents wrestle with questions around what was happening in their church, it made her comfortable to do the same. And they supported her in that. Um, and I think that is incredibly amazing. So, friend, my question for you after sharing that part is what question have you been afraid to ask God? What have you been afraid to say out loud? Something that you've been pretending doesn't exist or just stuffed, put in a box and buried out in the backyard? What is that question? And perhaps you haven't even admitted it to yourself. So I'd encourage you to just think about that. If you're generally not the person who questions God, that's been a new thing for me is just learning how to question everything, learning how to question God, um, and also learning how to be honest in my emotions with God. So the third memorial stone that struck me in Kathy's life, this was several events that happened in her life, but I was just thinking of her wilderness season, right? She talked about getting married, getting divorced, having a miscarriage, you know, just the long waiting until she was able to have children, feeling disqualified. She shared that she did all the right things, got married, and her marriage was a mess. So she ended up getting divorced. She thought that because she did the right things and married this man, whom even her community approved of, uh, she thought that that would automatically lead to the white picket fence, the kids. Instead, her husband left. And then because he left, it left her grieving, even having children, having a family. And so she went through season loves of not knowing whether she would be a mother. Uh, and then she shares the story of when God invited her to come away with her into a cabin in the woods during a snowstorm. And she didn't have big expectations, but she opened her Bible and landed on Isaiah 54. And for those of you who know, you know about Isaiah 54, right? The woman, the barren woman who has no children, but she's told to expand her tent, right? And to, you know, put down her tent pegs, expand to the left and to the right. And as she read that chapter in Isaiah, the words on the page lined up with her life. And she started to see that God was speaking to her. So she kept reading and God encountered her, and she realized that God is the one who is her husband. God is the one who is Elroy. He is the one who sees her. He is the one who makes promises, he keeps them, he declares his truth like a banner over her, which was way better than the labels that other people were putting on her. So that experience of just going away in silence and solitude and meeting the Lord there. She shares that later those promises were confirmed again through prophetic words from people who didn't know what she experienced, who didn't know how the Lord had spoken to her, but spoke directly to those promises. And that shift in that cabin became a memorial stone that just took her from being rejected and forgotten and disqualified to remembering that Jesus has a relationship with her, wants a relationship with her. So I thought that was really cool. It reminded me of Memorial Stone One in my book Reuben has seen my affliction. God saw Kathy's affliction in that season and he met her there. And the foundation she had established as a 14-year-old girl, right, one year after she started her deconstruction, that set the foundation for her finding God in this place, in this cabin, in the snowstorm. So, friend, I have a question for you. When you look back over your life and you see the seasons of loss, things like divorce, where you lose your husband and the potential for having children for some grief, right? And grief could be for losing someone who passes away or for losing a job or, you know, for losing something, right? Disappointment, unfulfilled dreams. So when you look back on those seasons of loss, friend, can you see where God met you and how he met you? Just like God met Kathy in that cabin in the woods. And maybe it's through a specific verse, maybe it's a word, an event, a picture, a place, a song. Can you think of how God showed up for you during that time? If you can, I would invite you to write that down and go back to it, right? Like that's the whole idea of Memorial Stones, that we write down these places where God showed up and then we go back to it and read it so so that when we're in seasons of challenge and turmoil, we can go back then, we can be encouraged again. I was invited to speak at an event a few weeks ago, and I shared with the women on uh the call that I sometimes forget to read my own book and remind myself of where God showed up. And so a friend of mine had reminded me one day because I was going through it and she said, Girl, you need to read your own book. Don't you remember God showed up for you like this, this, and this, and that particular memorial stone? And I was like, Yes. So even though I wrote this book, Memorial Stones, I still have to be reminded to go back to it and see the places where God shows up. Well, friend, as I wrap up this reflection on my interview with Kathy, I'm thinking of some other moments that really stuck with me. Like when she encouraged us to seek God where he wants to be found in that season. Do you remember her talking about that? Where she talked about, you know, the joy children have when you're playing hide and seek with them, and that sometimes it's like that with God. So when we're going through seasons of we're not hearing him, um, I recently went through a season like that where I was like, man, I'm just not, I'm not hearing God. Um, and so she said, So seek him, seek him where you can find him. And what I loved about what she said, ordinarily I would think of seeking him as oh, from the uh perspective of opening my Bible, going to prayer, going to worship, going to church. But I love what she said that perhaps in that season, God might be showing up for you in nature. So then go on walks. You know, perhaps he might be showing up for you in some other activity that you do. So do that thing. And when I was editing that particular episode, it was weeks after we had recorded it. And that ministered to me so deeply because I was in a season of not hearing God's voice. And so when I heard her say that, I was like, oh yeah. Um and so I knew the activity I was going to engage, um, where I would find God, and I started doing that. And anyway, he was nudging me in that direction. Um I just started hearing him again. So uh I love that she shared that and I love that it um ministered to me weeks later. The other thing that she shared, friend, do you remember this part when she was in the hospital under meds and she said she couldn't hear God's voice and that she never wanted to be in that position again because she because it was awful. She would rather be in pain than not hear God's voice. That blew my mind. Kathy dropped so many gems, and I tell you what, she is a wealth of wisdom and such a light to those who do life with her. And so I'm so glad that I met Kathy. I'm so glad we recorded that episode and what she shared just spoke volumes to me. Friend, I hope my interview with Kathy also spoke volumes to you. Next week, you'll hear my interview with Pat Doming. I can't wait for you to hear. That was a fun one to record as well. So listen until the end of this episode so that you can hear a preview of my interview with Pat. Hey, if you found this episode enjoyable, please drop a review. Follow the show wherever you listen. You know, subscribe on YouTube. If you're on Apple Podcasts, hit a follow. And if you haven't left a review, please leave a review. This is what helps other people find the show. And so I would love for you to leave a review. So, friends, I will chat with you again next week. And don't forget, stay tuned for a preview of next week's episode with Pat Domain.

SPEAKER_01 19:21

God doesn't just forgive, He forgets. He erases the board, he destroys the evidence, he burns the microfilm, he clears the computer. He doesn't remember my mistakes. For all the things he does do, this is one thing he refuses to do. He refuses to keep a list of my wrongs. When I ask for forgiveness, he doesn't pull out a clipboard and say, but I have already forgiven you for 516 times. He doesn't remember. As far as the East is from the West, as far as he has removed our trans so far, he has removed our transgressions from us. I will be merciful toward their iniquities. Even if you are stained as red as crimson, I can make you as white as wool. All of that to say that night, my life changed because he spoke to me through his word. And I had to remember, go all the way back to where I started.

SPEAKER_00 20:20

If this episode resonated with you, there are two things I'd like you to consider. Number one, rate and review the show. This will help other listeners find the show and get the same inspiration and encouragement you got from it. And number two, I would love for you to share this episode with someone you love and someone you think could benefit from hearing this particular episode. Also, if you would like to connect with me outside of this podcast, you can find everything related to me on my website, brendasavanu.com. There you can find my social media links if you'd like to follow. You can find a link to sign up for an email so that you can get weekly encouragement to your inbox, and you can find information about my book and coaching sessions. So, friends, thank you again so much for listening to this episode and thank you for considering sharing it with your friends. See you next time.